How to be a ~Yogi~ & BE YOU
I am a yogi.
What do you immediately think of when you read that? What do you assume I am like? How do you assume I am as a person when I say, I am a yogi.
That statement assumes its own identity; that identity communicates its own set of “rules”- its own set of implicit guidelines for behavior. Naturally, the more we begin to identify with certain archetypes, beginning from the time we are children, we begin to associate meaning - create connections between identity and behavior - so much so that we lose the ability to differentiate between self and the many identities we’ve - and others - have associated with Self.
If I’m a yogi, then I must… do this… act like this… say this… think this
The problem with this paradigm is that we try so desperately to fit into the box. The box of who a yogi must be. The box of what it means to be a yogi. The box of how you should speak/ act/ dress - how you should be - if you are a so called yogi .
When in reality, this character is not you. You are separate from The Yogi. You are you.
You get to decide what it means to you to be a yogi.
You see, it’s in our DNA to belong. Its one of the most - if not the most - powerful motivators in determining how we behave, what beliefs we adopt, and ultimately, what identity we choose to wear.
From the beginning of time, humans needed to belong - to groups, to tribes, to families - in order to survive. If you didn’t belong, you most likely wouldn’t survive. At the risk of sounding dramatic, belonging quite literally became a matter of life and death.
However, although humans have adapted to a ‘modern’ society - one in which we’re not outwardly dependent on our tribe for safety from predators and literal lions - our primal instinct to belong is one that is so deeply embedded, so thoroughly intertwined in our DNA that, in the grand scheme of evolution, the divergence away from this tribal survival instinct is brand new; on the timeline of human evolution, this new way of existing - a paradigm in which individuation does not directly threaten our existence - still has the tags on it.
All this to say, let’s take a moment to cultivate compassion for ourselves; let’s take a moment to cultivate compassion for the fact that behind our compulsion to belong is a powerful, primal, and subconscious instinct to literally survive.
So, like me, if you’ve ever abandoned your truth to “fit in”, if you’ve ever just “went along with it” even though you felt the misalignment deep down, if you’ve ever said “yes” but felt “no”, this is the moment to forgive yourself. This is the moment to release the judgment. This is the moment to replace the shame for not being able to override survival instincts that have been intertwined into thousands of years of DNA.
However, that being said, there is good news : we’re not doomed to our DNA. In fact, the simple awareness of this deeply engrained disposition is the antidote.
But, what now? How do we begin to challenge our evolution? How do we begin to re-program an instinct so acutely woven into our design and embrace the beautiful uniqueness that is inherent to being you?
Well, first, we’ve got to
Disassociate from the identity : Simply stated - you are not a yogi. You are you and you practice yoga. You may have been practicing yoga for decades. You may resonate with the yogic philosophies on a soul level. You may have studied at an ashram in India for months. But, at the end of the day, you are not the projected image of any title - you are you. This paradigm shift is freedom. Freedom from the constraints of any archetype. Freedom from the confines of perceived parameters. Freedom from judgement for not adhering to the way you are “supposed to be”. Freedom to change. Freedom to continue to evolve - as YOU - not as a yogi. Freedom from being tethered to any identity outside your truest expression of Self. Freedom to define what it means to be “a yogi” to YOU.
Then,
Begin to replace “if…then” with “this… and” : Begin to notice the conditional statements we live by. If I do this, then this will happen… If I say this, then this will happen….Begin to notice the conditional statements we live by and start to challenge them. Start to question if those conditions have to be True. Start to get curious about what would happen if something else were True. Start to marinate in the wonder of what is True for you. Then shift from if I practice yoga, then… to I practice yoga, AND… I like to drink with my friends… AND I eat meat… AND I say fu*k. Begin to question whatever feels mutually exclusive.
Then,
Find comfort outside the “box”: At first, it may feel scary to embody these perceived contradictions. At first, you may feel duplicitous, hypocritical, even disembodied - for a moment. But, the more you begin to untie yourself from the limitations of these identities, the more comfortable you’ll become being you - in whatever combination of beliefs, likes, dislikes, hobbies, practices, etc that takes shape as.
Instead of fitting in a ‘box’, you are the box - you get to add things to your box.
There is no ‘box’, no archetype, no stereotype, no prototype complex enough to represent all of you. You are so beautifully unique. You are a snowflake with consciousness.
We’ve got to stop molding who we are in an effort to belong; we’ve got to stop trying to fit in the same box with everyone else - it’s too crowded in there. Begin to fill your box up with everything that makes you you - despite the perceived contradictions, despite the fear of judgement, despite the voices in your head telling you “you can’t be both”. You can.
You can be you - in whatever combination that is.